Amanda Dill: The Worst Blogger Ever

Letter from a Professor

2009-06-11T20:00:00.002-05:00

I didn't wake up this morning expecting anything profound or even mildly good. As usual, I was presently surprised, this time by one of the English professors at East Central (my university). Below you'll find his letter, which was dispatched to us via campus email. (I did get his permission to repost. Really. :D)

Honestly, this is so close to my own views on the subject it's almost scary. Anyway—here it is. (Long, but worth the read, promise.)
"I did not know then how much was ended. When I look back now ... I can still see the butchered women and children lying heaped and scattered all along the crooked gulch as plain as when I saw them with eyes still young. And I can see that something else died there in the bloody mud, and was buried in the blizzard. A people's dream died there. It was a beautiful dream ... the nation's hoop is broken and scattered. There is no center any longer, and the sacred tree is dead."

--- Black Elk, Black Elk Speaks

Yesterday a white supremacist, anti-Semitic, holocaust-denying terrorist broke into the Holocaust Museum in Washington D.C. and opened fire with a rifle killing a security officer before being shot himself. This man had long published his hateful views on a website, blog before he took action. FBI and Homeland Security officials have been warning that terrorism by American citizens will likely rise due to economic hard times, the election of President Obama and the perceived liberal socialism in America.

Interestingly, the same day just before the shooting occurred at the Museum, Rush Limbaugh was pontificating on his radio show that Obama (he never refers to him as President Obama) "like God" doesn't have a birth certificate" since he (Limbaugh) has never seen it. Limbaugh and others continuously fan the flames of disrespect for our elected President and for the political process that is currently the choice of the majority in this country.

My purpose is not to tell you what political party to belong to or how to vote (in case you are wondering I am Independent and have voted for both Democratic and Republican candidates in many elections at all levels of government in my lifetime. On some issues I am rather liberal, on some I am rather conservative -- though I think these terms have lost their original meaning).

My purpose is to tell you that the hatred, the willful denial of facts, the undermining of a democratic process, the inflammatory rhetoric, the refusal to acknowledge the rights of American citizens who have properly been in this country for generations or who have been accepted via the immigration process, the blind ethnocentricism -- all this leads only to chaos and threatens the peaceful existence of us all.

My purpose is to tell you that the reason the course called "Ethnic Literature" exists in the curriculum of ECU is to help us all appreciate the diversity of our rich American society and to help us understand the many things we all have in common, and to help us all grow more tolerant and respectful of differences. The reason people do not respect others is because they do not respect themselves, do not respect life and they have a deep insecurity that only hatred makes possible for them to temporarily stomach, until one day, some act out in violent ways. It is a fact of human existence, whether in individual relationships or in social groups or political factions, any insecure person must bring someone else down in order to prop up his/her own lack of inner peace. In other words, much of the nonsense we hear splattered across the airwaves, television and internet is simply the projections of one's misguided fear and failure onto an audience he/she hopes will gulp down his/her unsupported and simplistic reasoning like a stupid fish swallowing a baited hook. If I am blind, incompetent, misinformed and/or hateful, I must project those insecurities onto you, so then there will be others like me -- a fellowship of the insecure. Like a junior high clique where character assassination is practiced by stupid cowards -- sometimes understandable for twelve-year olds, not so for adults.

My purpose is to tell you that in a democracy we have the right to speak, hopefully with civility and with honest engagement of fact and sources, and we also have the right to vote. Beyond this we have the responsibility to live with and respect opinions and views and people that we may not initially like or always agree with. If we fail in this responsibility, then we will soon no longer have the rights we all enjoy.

Obviously all people who are in opposition to President Obama's political policies are not terrorists nor are they wrong to oppose President Obama. But if we devalue honest dialogue, if we resort to name-calling and personal attack, then we are no better than our opponent, and logically, have no basis to make our case. The democracy has only one option, then, but to degenerate into chaos, where only force and violence can restore order. For me, in spite of inconveniences of our system, I prefer dialogue and tolerance to force, for in force, I may overthrow you, but someone else, eventually will overthrow me. What is the point of this endless cycle, then, of revenge? Wouldn't we then be just like the Muslim terrorists that all of us fear and that right-wing folks in America continuously point to as barbarian and evil?

The passage I quoted above is from a Sioux named Black Elk who was in the Battle of Little Bighorn and at the Wounded Knee Massacre later in his life. His recollection of the slaughter should remind us all that as serious and as heinous as terrorism from overseas is, our own home-grown terrorism is even worse. It is one thing for our overseas fanatics to terrorize us, it is far more serious and immoral for us, in the name of democracy, to terrorize our own citizens.

If you think I am just overstating things as a liberal professor, I would simply ask you to consider the family of the slain security guard from yesterday's hateful attack. Put yourself in the living room of his family. How does it feel? What did this man and/or his family do to deserve this other than have the wrong skin color? I ask you to consider the thousands upon thousands of people who survived prison camps and witnessed the gas ovens of the holocaust. What did they do wrong besides have the wrong religion?

I ask us all to renew our commitment to not live by stereotype, to go beyond the surface of simplistic name-calling, to learn to judge people by their acts, not their ethnic heritage or religious persuasion or any other factor you may disagree with.

As a citizen, I fear the more we refuse to read and learn of our past, the more confused and impotent we become in the present and the more doubtful a successful future becomes. After all, this is America, you have the right to be dumb. But what happens if enough of us practice that right? We will lose that very right. As a professor, I ask you to read, read, read. Read Man's Search for Meaning by Victor Frankl. Read the books on the Bibliography of Primary Sources listed on your Blackboard. I understand that many of the American, neo-Nazi type terrorists are not dumb (a common misconception). Often they are highly educated, intelligent, but hateful people. Given this, the good citizens also ought to be educated, well-read people. That includes you, hopefully. Oh, and by the way, the reading will not only give you perspective by which to make decisions, it will enrich your life. By enriching I mean, you will never again be bored, ignorant, lacking for stimulus or confused about that which is beautiful and necessary. In life, we don't always know what to do, but we can always know what not to do. That is an absolute worth knowing and a virtue worth practicing.

Peace!
Kenneth Hada PhD
Associate Professor
English & Languages
East Central University
khada@ecok.edu

Chronic Pain Barbie

2009-05-30T16:50:00.002-05:00

Chronic Pain Barbie, originally uploaded by Migraine Chick.

I'm no doll, that's for sure--but I figured it was about time for an update on the IH mess--because that's what it is...a mess. I've got pills out the wahzoo...but do any of them help? Nope, not really. Sure, I can knock myself out, but what good does that do? None at all as far as I'm concerned. If I'm gonna wake up groggy, I'd like to at least have fun the night before.

Now, don't get me wrong, it's not all bad--it just seems that way when you're on your fifth or sixth day of working in 20 minute blocks because you can't focus much longer than that. Then there's the people you disappoint because you can't remember they were talking to you, much less what they were talking about. (Yes, my pharmaceuticals are that good.)

The long and short of it is--I'm working my arse off. I have lots of work lined up this year, and it won't get done without me. There's bound to be some fun in there somewhere, but I have to take care of myself and my boys above everything else. This last semester of college may not be easy (in fact, I know it won't be) but if all of you--my friends, readers, and colleagues--will hang in there with me, it'll be worth the ride. Promise.

[PS. If you're unfamiliar with IH, go back to some of my previous blogs: like this one, that one, or the other one or visit The IH Research Foundation.]

::Down and Dirty Southern Cookin':: (aka Swine Flu Supper)

2009-05-14T18:58:00.004-05:00

Hold on to your hats and your tastebuds, folks--this is gonna get a little messy. And it just *might* blow your mind. Are you ready? Sure you are. Here it is: the Swine Flu Supper.

The first step is to gather up all the items you're gonna need to concoct this mess (don't worry, I made a list):

Boneless Chicken--either breast or thigh...it doesn't really matter as long as it's boneless. One piece per person is usually enough, unless you're feeding a Bubba (but that's another blog).

Bacon--peppered or smoked--whatever you like. Probably 2-3 slices per piece of chicken.

Flour--all-purpose is good...ah...and just get the whole bag out. I never measure, so I really have no idea how much you'll need. (If your one of those people who freaks out without an exact measurement, use a cup to start with. Add more when you need it. And you will. haha!)

Seasonings--this is the fun part. You want Latin? Add taco seasoning to the flour. You want Southern comfort food? Just mix in some salt, pepper, and a little paprika. If you want the really, really good stuff (and if you love garlic, like I do) add a couple tablespoons of Garlic Garni and some black pepper (a couple teaspoons, IDK.). *That* is fantastic. [You can also mix a bit of that with some melted butter and brush it over thawed/partially baked frozen yeast rolls--and you'll think you've died and gone to heaven. seriously.]

Vegetable or Canola Oil, heated in a (preferably cast iron) deep skillet. Needs to be about 1-1.5 inches deep.

You'll also need an egg and a bit of milk--just beat em up and leave in the bowl for a sec.

1 toothpick per bacon slice, soaked in a bowl of water for at least 15 minutes. (You'll see why in a minute. Just do it.)

Now, if you're like me, you like your chicken to be flavorful--this requires a marinade. The simplest way to do this is to pop your chicken pieces into a ziploc bag with a few glugs of zesty Italian dressing and a few splashes of worchestershire sauce. Refridgerate for at least half an hour, and then you're ready to TCB.

On to the fun part--getting messy. I'm going to assume you're all somewhat familar with the process of breading something to be fried. You've at least eaten fried stuff, right? Of course ya have. Mix your desired seasoning combo into your flour in a pie plate. Put your eggy mixture next to that, and make sure you have your pan ready to cook.

Pat your chicken pieces dry, and wrap each piece in 2-3 bacon slices. This is where those soggy toothpicks come in--use them to keep the bacon in place. It works best if you push them all the way through, and then push them back in on one side so that they're barely poking through.

Next, dredge the bacon-wrapped chicken pieces (ie, put em) in the seasoned flour. Move them from there into the eggy mix, and then back into the flour. Make sure everything gets wet and then floured again--this is what makes the crispy crust so yummy!

After each piece is battered, gently place them in the hot oil. (Again, make sure the oil is all hot and bothered BEFORE you add the chicken. It's very important.) Once the first side is just about browned up--use a fork and your tongs (you know not to pierce your meat while cooking, right? Don't do it. It's BAD.) to remove the toothpicks. Be easy, we're dealing with hot oil here--use the fork to hold the chicken down, tongs (or your fingers, if you're brave/have hands made of asbestos) and pull the toothpicks out. Then flip the chicken pieces (with the tongs! don't use your hands!) and finish cooking.

Tada! All done. (Don't forget to turn the burner off...not that I've ever left it on and filled the entire house with smoky ick...but, yanno...just make sure you turn it off.)

Now, as far as side dishes go, you have options. You could make fried potatoes--with onions if you wanna get REALLY into the Southern thang--or you can just whip up some mashed potatoes, top em with a little gravy (which you could make yourself...or you could take some help from the store and stir up some packaged gravy.)

If you can get ahold of some fresh corn, shuck em, put em on sheets of foil along with butter, and some Garlic Garni or a little salt and pepper, wrap em up, and bake for about 15 minutes on 375.
Or you can just serve up Ma's old fashioned red beans--which take a while to make, but they're good.

If you're really into the whole plating thing, you could crisp up a couple pieces of bacon and crumble them over the chicken--or the mashed potatoes, whichever you want. I usually just pile it all on a plate and chow down, but hey, whatever floats your boat.

::You Must Be THIS MUCH Injun to Ride::

2009-05-13T15:00:00.002-05:00

Chukma! (That's hello in Chickasaw.) I'm gonna start off by saying that I rather like belonging to the Chickasaw Nation. They've been pretty nice to me...they pay my bills on occasion, they gave me a laptop, and they even give me money for college and clothes. I'd say that's pretty cool of them.

What really gets under my skin though, is this business of the blood quantum requirements. If I had the resources, I'd do a survey--and just tabulate how many 'citizens,' like me, do not meet the quantum requirements...to be governor, for example. I can understand the age requirement...but...quantum restrictions? Psh.

I also noticed that one must meet the 1/4 requirement to be elected a Chickasaw Princess--not a job I'd be inclined to reach for...but still. What does that tell the girls who do not posses the requisite 1/4 quantum? That they are not worthy of recognition by their tribe? What a crock, eh?

So, really...I suppose it boils down to the question that haunts every person of mixed ancestry--Am I white? (I really do look it.) Am I Native American? (I am quite emotionally attached to the idea...and I *have* studied the history of my tribe, its culture, and its language.) It's an issue that is ongoing...and neither side offers much in the way of solace for those struggling. It's quite obvious that there is nobody clamoring for white/European culture to be preserved. Not really anyway. So why lock out those of us (well, me at least) who may not meet the minimum quantum requirement--but are truly passionate about the preservation of the customs of the tribe? Doesn't make much sense to me.

Well, that's about all I've got to say...Chi Pisa La Cho (I will see you, in Chickasaw, of course.)

The crappiest thing about poetry...

2009-05-10T00:11:00.002-05:00

...besides the fact that people don't seem to enjoy it as they should *ahem*, is that the person/people/thing the poem is about/for rarely, if ever, sees it. Sure, if the poet writes about their significant other, odds are he/she/they will read it, but even that one's not always a given. Who knows, it might be...how do I say this...unpleasant for both parties, depending on the subject matter. But that's not my point, at least not tonight.

So, yeah, sometimes poetry is crappy in that it sometimes goes unnoticed--but there are myriad ways in which poetry can be very, VERY awesome. Say, for example, you are really upset at someone...or about something...in prose, you kind of have to lay it all out there. Not so with poetry, at least not every time. You can hide your anger, your disappointment, your grief--simply tuck it away in a word, a phrase, or a symbol--and nobody will ever know. But you'll know...and it's out there...just waiting...for someone to read it and say 'hmmm...she sounds pissed/upset/confused/whatever...'

Which brings me full circle, back to the crappy thing about poetry. Ain't that a bitch.

::Eat This Book::

2009-04-04T16:15:00.003-05:00

Have you ever read a book so good you want to read it over and over til you've digested every single word of it? I have: The Last Chinese Chef. You may have heard of it...but if you haven't, let me enlighten you. Nicole Mones, the author....is simply fantastic. Her carefully crafted tale of food, of love, of guanxi--you will have to read it to understand--it draws the reader into the intricate pattern of people, places, food, and tradition in a way I have never experienced.

As you follow the wandering trail through the intricacies of this novel, direct your browser here. You'll find many of the recipes described in the novel--after Mones' descriptions, you may find yourself eager, as I was, to attempt to recreate the marvelous dishes and revel in the meaning so deeply embedded in every ingredient. After eating only one dish--which, I'm sure, as an American home cook with little experience in Asian cooking, I butchered sacrilegiously--I could not help but to re-read the novel. The second reading proved better than the first, as I knew it would.

Crazy, isn't it, how a single book can transport you to far away places in your mind--and then convince you that you, too, should travel there, and experience this for yourself.

---And now I'm off to gather the ingredients for another dish from the book: Beggar's Chicken.

Psst....don't forget to check out Cameron's story, and our birthday wish, here.

A DELICIOUS Meal...& A Poem

2009-04-01T14:56:00.003-05:00

I love cooking--especially since my spiffy new cutlery set arrived. (So it's supposed to be my birthday present from the hubs...and that's not til the 16th--Hello? I picked it out, ordered it, and signed for the package. My birthday came early this year. For real.) Anyhow, Blog-Land dwellers, I thought I'd share a spectacular recipe-ish thing that I (sort of) made up.

And it's easy. REALLY easy.

It has been dubbed: Effin' Delicious Chicken. For good reason. You'll see why.

Let's get started!

First, you need Butter. (Yes, with a capital B.) The real stuff--not that sissy Country Crock. I use a lot of it. You don't (necessarily) have to. But you should.

Flat leaf parsley. Same idea as the butter. You don't even have to chop it up. How easy is that?

Garlic. I chop mine. More garlic flavor that way. If you want it less garlicky, thrown in whole cloves. Or crushed ones. Yep. That's how it works.

Chicken Thighs--however many you need. You can use breasts or whatever if you want--but WHY? (Seriously.)

Bacon. Slices of it. Enough of them to cover the chicken. I cut them in half, but you do whatever you want. Just put the bacon on the skin. (hehe.)

Pop everything into a baking dish. Then the chicken. Then put the bacon on top. Cover with foil. Bake at 350 for about an hour. Then uncover. Bake longer. Til the bacon's crispy. This whole process usually takes about 15 minutes--but if you're impatient, you can always pop the whole deal under the broiler. Just be careful. Nobody likes burnt bacon.)

Now, while the chicken is baking away, it wouldn't be right not to make something to go with it--even if it IS good enough to eat the entire pan of bacon-y scrumptiousness on it's own. That's where the polenta comes in.

That's pretty easy too. You have two options. You can be SUPER lazy and buy tubes of pre-made polenta at the market, slice it into rounds, top with mozzarella and Parmesan, and bake til the cheese is bubbly...which is fine. Just lazy.

Or, you can make your own polenta--any basic polenta recipe will do, I use the one in my handy-dandy Better Crocker cookbook. Mhmm. See, once the polenta is 'done'...you layer it with butter, mozzarella, and Parmesan...and then top with MORE cheese...and bake it for about 20 minutes. At 350. How convenient, right? Add a salad--not an iceberg salad, for crying out loud, be creative--and you're good to go.

By the time the polenta's done, everything should be ready. And DELICIOUS.

And now, as promised--the poem:

Asphodel
I gave her daffodils
Gifts from the Goddess--
An offering of that which comes early
In memory of one who left too soon.
Signs of spring plucked
On a warm, windy morning,
With brightest hopes that their
Beauty would bring the joy
Of Earth's rebirth in Spring
To her troubled soul--
So that part of the asphodel-covered meadows
In which departed souls with Homer wander
Would bring her comfort--
Once the brightest stars in the Sky,
sent Earth-ward to brighten the spirits of those below.

© Amanda Dill 2009

WARNING--grammar and humor in one post--contents may explode.

2009-04-01T14:54:00.001-05:00

So, I'm on the ATEG listserv (I think that's American Teachers of English Grammar, but I'd have to look it up to be sure. It's bunch of grammarians emailing each other stuff.) Anyway, I usually read and go on...but today...I couldn't help getting involved in one of the topics of discussion. I'll repost the messages here, but without the people's names...anyway, you'll see.

******

Query on the use of the word 'got':

Isn’t this a good example of very poor usage? Unless my memory is very bad, it would have been cause for points off in my freshmen composition class. A sad commentary on the state of news writing in 2009

But Farley noted that bill sponsor Assemblyman Peter Abbate Jr., D-Brooklyn, hasn’t yet gotten a Democrat to introduce the bill in the Senate. The Democrats won control of the Senate this year.

One of the responses:

I tell my students that ‘got’ is the illegitimate child of the helping verb family.

Another, with a side-note on that response:

This looks like a good example of why we need to carefully distinguish “colloquial” from “ungrammatical.” I advise students to switch to the canonical passive in formal writing, but I view that as stylistic advice, not as a grammatical injunction.
As a side note on your analogy: Given the frequency with which helping verbs pair up with main verbs, I would expect a very, very large set of illegitimate offspring. It’s one of the many grey areas in grammar, and perhaps we should adjust to modernity and legalize grey marriage in this case.

*****

What? I thought it was HILARIOUS.

Psst: You Like This Book!

2009-03-31T23:10:00.005-05:00

Consider this your PSA for the Day. :)

Helen Kay Dimon is fantastic (and she's a blog-friend, so yes, WE like her.) Plus, she writes about *spicy* women...what's not to love? Anywho--the point of this post (love that alliteration, didja notice?) is to show ya'll this sexy cover ------->

...and to tell you that IT'S HOTTER IN HAWAII is now available. Not to get all Martha-Stewart-y or anything, this is a Good Thing. You should go buy it. Yes. Like, right now.

And once you've bought it, read it, and told me how much you LOVE it...you can check out Helen Kay Dimon's blog.

Edited to Add:

AND, lovelies, Miz Dimon just posted info on a spectacular contest--here you go:

::Uno Mas::

2009-03-31T20:23:00.002-05:00

I love going to school. Really. I do. That doesn't change the fact that I am SUPER excited to be FINISHING my Bachelors next semester. I mean, the folks in the English and Languages department at ECU are fantastic--but...I'm ready to vacate. It's gonna be a fun last semester though. :) More on that later--like, after the summer break!

In other news--the 'career fair' thing is taking place tomorrow at the University. I'm going, but I can't imagine anything I'd like to do LESS. It's like voluntarily walking into a two-hour job interview--in which you have no idea who your interviewers will be, or what they'll expect. Sure, we know what schools/companies will be there--but many of them don't have much info on their websites--if they have one. This *is* Oklahoma, after all. /sigh

Anywho, don't forget to check out Cameron's story, and our birthday wish, here.

::A Birthday Wish::

2009-03-30T23:11:00.008-05:00

Before I tell you what I want for my birthday this year, let me tell you a story. This story, which I will not even attempt to tell in its entirety, is about one amazing little boy, a struggle no child should have to endure, and the people who love him.

His name is Cameron. Now, I never met him--though I certainly wish I'd had that blessing. Cameron was but but fourteen years old when his body lost the battle with Anaplastic Astrocytoma on September 14, 2008. (For those of you who don't 'med-speak'...that's brain cancer.) His spirit, though, lives on. I told you already that this boy was amazing--I wasn't exaggerating. Cameron shared his story--via blogs , photographs, and his 'talky blogs.' But he didn't stop there. Cameron's dad, Henry, helped him create Brain Candy!, a magazine for and about other children with brain cancers.

In a letter posted on the website of The Brain Candy Project, Cameron writes:

"When I was in the hospital, I didn't meet any other kids with brain cancer because we were all so sick, and the doctors didn't want us around other sick kids. It was very lonely, and it felt like I must be the only kid going through brain cancer. Brain cancer in kids is rare, and the kind I have is even rarer.

The longer I've had it, the more I have heard about lots of other kids who have it, even though it is so rare. With Brain Candy!, I'm looking to bridge all the kids in the world who are living with brain cancer: to let them know they are not alone, to share our stories with one another, make friends, and encourage them to keep fighting while the grownups are looking for a cure. Maybe we can even help them find a cure!"

While Cameron sought to bring children comfort and hope, his dad strove to bring the same to the parents of those children. Having spent countless nights sleeping on the floor or in the chairs in Cameron's hospital room, Henry knew what other parents in similar situations had to cope with--often alone. This is the mission of The Brain Candy Project--to hold parents so parents can hold their children, to provide assistance where it's needed--and often not available.

The Brain Candy Project's support includes life administration services, such as financial management, nanny services, laundry, house/pet sitting, free parking at the hospital, as well as specialized workshops in arts, meditation, nutrition, cancer research, and more. A 24/7 Hotline for general support and research assistance is in the works as well. We will serve in local/regional hospitals, and then expand our work nationally/internationally. All goods and services provided through The Brain Candy Project will be AT NO COST to the families we serve.

Now you know a bit about Cameron--I have but one more thing for you. Cameron's birthday is April 16th--the same as mine. So this year, I'd like to ask my friends to help me celebrate something more than my birthday by celebrating Cameron's--with donations to the organization he helped found--The Brain Candy Project.

Happy Birthday to us. Cheers, Cameron. Much love.

Worst. Blogger. Ever.

2009-03-30T18:04:00.003-05:00

I'm not a good blogger. Not even a little bit. Not even at all. See, blogging for me is a lot like what happens to most people when they make New Year's Resolutions...I start out with good intentions...and then I get distracted...and then I completely forget about it altogether. (And then a few weeks/months later, I remember I was doing something...this!)

So, here's the thing: Scissortail is THIS WEEK. My book? Also due out this week. (No news yet on whether or not the publisher will have it ready that soon. I'm just sayin'.) On top of that, I'm working on multiple for papers and projects for school that ARE. NOT. DONE. Or even started. /sigh

Dear blog readers, I have failed you. But I'll make up for it. Promise. Ok, scratch that. I'm not promising anything...because we both know I'm not going to hold up my end of the bargain. Ok, so there will be another post soon--it is almost my birthday. :)

Keep your eyes peeled--the next post will contain a VERY important birthday-present request. And no, I'm not begging for a pony. I live in Oklahoma. We have those here. :)

~Scissortail Schedule 2009~

2009-03-11T16:17:00.005-05:00

Ok, folks. Here's the full and FINAL schedule. Though I think everyone would have a BLAST if they came to every session, I know that's not possible. So, please feel free to find the days/times you can come and choose a session or find your favorite authors. As always, if you have any questions (about where the sessions are or about any of the authors) just ask. :)

THURSDAY--APRIL 2

I. (9:30-10:45) Estep Center

Patrick Ocampo – Bartlesville, Oklahoma

Surface Tension

Leah Kayajanian – University of Oklahoma

The Places We Choose to Hide

John Yozzo – East Central University

Death of the Undergraduate ...

II. (11-12:15) Estep Center

Jim Chastain – Norman, Oklahoma

Poetry in the Real World

Jane Taylor – Oklahoma City, Oklahoma

What Can Be Saved

John Morris – Cameron University

New Stories

*** LUNCH ***

III. (2-3:15) Estep Center

Bryan Mitschell – Univ. Central Oklahoma

What They Say

Hardy Jones – Cameron University

Childhood in Life Writing

Sandra Soli – Oklahoma City, Oklahoma

Offstage: Poems as Monologue

IV. (3:30-4:45) Estep Center

Jeanetta Calhoun Mish – Norman, OK

JB; Swinging on the Gate

Steven Schroeder – Chicago, Illinois

Six Stops South

Huichun (Amy) Liang – Univ. of Maryland

Two Southwests ...

V. (6:30 pm) Estep Center

Fisher High School Contest Winners

Featuring Elmer Kelton

Sandhills Boy: The Winding Trail

of a Texas Writer

FRIDAY--APRIL 3

VI. (9:30-10:45) Estep Center

Melissa Morphew – Sam Houston State U.

Weeding Borges’ Garden

Gordon Greene – Midwest City, Oklahoma

Why Don’t Elephants Play Tennis?

Alvin Turner – East Central University

Hanging Men

VII. (9:30-10:45) North Lounge

Carl Sennhenn – Norman, Oklahoma

Recoveries: Not Necessarily Autobiographical

Rachel Jackson – University of Oklahoma

Oklahoma: Making Peace With This Place

J.C. Mahan – Edmond Oklahoma

Learning to Craft: Art and Love

VIII. (11-12:15) Estep Center

Featuring Rilla Askew

Hat Trick

*** LUNCH ***

IX. (2-3:15) Estep Center

Paul Bowers – Northern OK Coll. – Enid

Glow

Carol Hamilton – Midwest City, Oklahoma

Shots On

Larry Griffin – Kansas, Oklahoma

At Home in Tennessee

X. (2-3:15) North Lounge

Ron Wallace – Durant, Oklahoma

I come from Cowboys .. and Indians (I come

from Oklahoma)

Tara Hembrough – Oklahoma State University

Sitting on the Church Roof and Hoping

to See God

Jennifer Kidney – Norman, Oklahoma

Observations of Wildlife

XI. (3:30-4:45) Estep Center

Alan Berecka – Del Mar College

The Comic Flaw

Jason Roberts – Oklahoma State University

Approach Shot

Rockford Johnson – Chickasha, Oklahoma

All Things Flow

XII. (3:30-4:45) North Lounge

Robin Carstensen – Oklahoma State University

Blue Sombra

Tracy Haught – Cameron University

The Pigtail Ward

Don Stinson – Northern Oklahoma College

Falling from the Mountain

XIII. (7:00pm) Estep Center

Featuring LeAnne Howe

Miko Kings

SATURDAY--APRIL 4

XIV. (8:30- 9:45) Estep Center

Dorothy Alexander – Cheyenne, Oklahoma

No Other Life: Growing Up, Growing Old

Bob Johnson – Eastern Kentucky University

A Good Numb

Maria Hooley – Lawton, Oklahoma

The Landscape of the Heart

XV. (8:30-9:45) North Lounge

Silas Tsang – Oklahoma State Univ.

It’s Hard to Say Goodbye to Yesterday

Mark Francis – U. of Central Oklahoma

The Goings on Inside an Indian Health Clinic on this Particular Day

Arn Henderson – Univ. of Oklahoma

Base Line and Meridian

XVI. (10 --11:15) Estep Center

Jim Spurr – Shawnee, Oklahoma

A Workin God

Joshua Grasso – East Central University

The Excavation of Nein Nunb

Shirley Hall – Broken Arrow, Oklahoma

Life, Love & Controversy in Middle America

XVII. (10--11:15) North Lounge

Nathan Brown – Univ. Of Oklahoma

Two Tables Over ...

Louis Silvester – Oklahoma State Univ

Suit Pocket Secrets

Hugh Tribbey, East Central University

Asteroid

XVIII. (11:30-12:45) Estep Center

Julie Hensley - Eastern Kentucky U.

The Recklessness of Water

Jenny Cropp – Oklahoma State Univ. Food for the Dead

Jerry Brigham – East Central Univ.

Tales of Outlaws, Monkey Murders and Bootleggers

XIX. (11:30 - 12:45) North Lounge

Karen Sisk – Oklahoma State Univ

Daddy’s Little Girl’s Recovery

Philip MacKenzie – Rose State College

Barley Legal ...

Jason Poudrier – Cameron University

Red Fields

Surface Tension

2009-03-08T12:02:00.003-05:00

Patrick Ocampo *just* emailed me to announce that his (surely fantabulous) first book, "Surface Tension", has been released by Mongrel Empire Publishing. He tells me it's a collection of poetry and short stories, along with photographs taken by his (talented) wife, Christine Russell. The book is available through Amazon.Com or directly from Patrick (see links at right or email me and I'll put you in touch w/ him).

Congrats Patrick! Looking forward to a good read!!

...This Just In...

2009-01-21T14:04:00.001-06:00

A quick note to ring out the Rat and wish you a happy, prosperous, and peaceful year of the Ox (a little early, but the time seems right...)

...and to let you know that my new book, Six Stops South, is out now from Cherry Grove Collections.

The publisher's page is here: http://www.cherry-grove.com/schroeder.html

and links to purchase online here: http://home.earthlink.net/~steven_schroeder/sixstopssouth.htm

Hope you're all well, and that you're finding the world full of poetry!

Peace,
Steve

I think Alice had it right on this one in her response to the hookah-smoking caterpillar...

2009-01-18T22:30:00.002-06:00

[If you don't get the title, please look here.]

Readers, I feel the need to inform you early in this particular post that the focus of the interview (Steven Schroeder, whose name I have look up each time I type it because I've had to correct its spelling about a zillion times) cheated when answering my questions. Really, he did! (I suppose I can let it slide this time though, since he did give me a marvelous and well-thought-out answer.) See for yourselves:

Q: Who is your favorite author and what is it that really strikes you about their work?

A: Hard to limit this to one author...(See, he knows he's cheating even before he begins!) Among poets, I love Wallace Stevens for the philosophical depth and aesthetic beauty of his work...classical Chinese poets like Li Bai and Du Fu for the economy and compression of their work... Sonia Sanchez, Adrienne Rich, Denise Levertov are all high on my list... among contemporary Chinese poets, Li Nan, Li Sen, Hai Nan... Irish poets, including Eamon Grennan and Samuel Beckett (as a playwright, yes, but also as a poet)... Miller Williams and Lucinda Williams are both among my favorites, as is Leonard Cohen... there are some wonderful poets writing in Oklahoma, Texas, and New Mexico now (including the ones at this conference!)... Jo Carol Pierce, Butch Hancock... I always appreciate the honesty and clarity of what Larry Thomas writes about Texas, and the same is true of Wendy Barker... among novelists, I'm especially taken with A.G. Mojtabai (who taught at Tulsa and lives in Amarillo), Toni Morrison, and Salman Rushdie... and from a generation or two earlier, William Goyen and Flannery O'Connor...

Schroeder writes mainly lyric poetry, and on occasion fiction or narrative poetry—which has characters based on people (including non-human ones) that he knows (who are always made up). He's currently working on a book of philosophy of religion with colleagues in China, Lithuania, and Russia—his piece is on mysticism as a way of knowing. (This isn't surprising if you know that Steven holds graduate degrees from the University of Chicago in philosophy and religious studies.)

Like many writers, Schroeder knew he loved writing at an early age, but the decision to write professionally came much later. His days now consist of: a morning walk, several hours of uninterrupted writing, and other things as required (you know, to pay the bills). “For poetry,” he says, “it is as Gwendolyn Brooks said, 'a matter of opening a window—or getting out in the world.'” Describing poetry as “a socially sanctioned form of eavesdropping,” he says he thinks all writing involves research—either of the academic (butt-in-library) or the paying attention (butt-in-world) variety. When he's not writing, Schroeder enjoys painting, photography, and walking—and reading and listening to music.

So far, Schroeder's publication list includes six collections of poetry and five books on philosophy and religious studies—along with five more poetry collections (currently making the rounds with publishers) and another philosophy book under contract. Though his cat wishes he'd stop writing (she doesn't fit comfortably under the keyboard...), I hope he continues to write—if for no other reason than to amuse me.

I was going to add a bit here about the book Steven Schroeder would choose if he had only one to read for the rest of this life, but he said he might have to shoot himself if he could only have one—so I didn't push the issue. Certainly don't need that sort of mess on my hands.

Steven's Last Words: “Enjoy [Scissortail]! This Festival is a wonderful banquet, and I am grateful to Ken Hada and others for making it happen.”

Good writing is... “a grabber opening, a memorable ending and about 1500 well-chosen words in between.”

2009-01-10T21:30:00.003-06:00

Gordon Greene hopes to inspire his readers to buy a lot more of his work—not a difficult task for the author of four collections and a formatting manual for writers. Those works are:

1.Colored Water & Other Illusions: Award-winning Short Short Stories

2. Reflections from the Heartland: Essays for People Who Never Liked Essays

3. Do Birds Know Love? and Other Poems

4. How to Format Your Manuscripts: A Guide for Professional Writers (and those who want to be)

5. Candles in the Dark: new poems by Gordon Greene

Greene isn't a one trick pony, though—his career began in the theatre where he has worked as a professional actor, director, playwright, and theatre manager, in addition to teaching theatre at the college level. His own education includes an undergraduate degree in secondary education in English, Speech, and Drama from East Tennessee State University, a Master's of Theatre Arts from Northwestern University, and an additional year at Wayne State University in Detroit, which Greene took in order to act with the first season of the Hilberry Classic Repertory Theatre, where they devoted nine months to rehearsing and performing four Shakespearean plays, rotating them over and over in true repertory.

Through courses in art, art appreciation, and art history, he also discovered a passion for painting (mostly watercolors and acrylics). Also an American History buff, he is in the process of collecting material for a series he's working on titled Great Ironies in American History. When he's not knee-deep in his research, he performs one-man shows and gives a number of talks and readings each year.

Greene's current project has taken him back into the theatre. He says, “I'm trying to interest more theatres and university drama departments in producing my Readers' Theatre drama, The Scopes Monkey Trial: What Really Happened. Unlike Inherit the Wind (a good piece of theatre, but fiction) my play is an historically accurate account of what many legal scholars regard as the most important trial in American history. It's about the 1925 trial in which the ACLU challenged a Tennessee law forbidding the teaching of evolution. As 2009 marks the bicentennial of Charles Darwin's birth and the 150 anniversary of his book Origin of the Species, the topic is particularly timely.”

Gordon's 'Last Words': [The most challenging thing about writing is] “finishing it and letting it go.”

...Taller Than the Average Bear...

2009-01-10T21:13:00.005-06:00

Author Paul Bowers doesn't just give his readers a good book—they occasionally find a good recipe nestled in his work. His formal education in the field of English, he says, makes it seem like he planned to be a writer all along, but this was not the case. In fact, he didn't decide to become a writer until he discovered he couldn't NOT be one.

Though he doesn't recognize any particular writing style in his work, he thinks he probably has one—though judging from what I've read thus far, I'd say his style is most simply labeled 'good.' Paul spends most of his time writing, even when he isn't—but you don't have to be afraid of talking to him, no. See, he makes up the people he knows (and the characters you'll find in his work) so you never have to wonder if 'that character' in his book is you. When he's not writing (or eating, sleeping, running, riding, or watching) he's probably reading—perhaps the book he'd said he'd gladly read over and over for the rest of his life: Whitman's Leaves of Grass.

Interestingly, he types backwards more often than forwards, a talent that comes from deleting more words and sentences than he keeps. He did manage to keep enough to make up his first book--Like Men, Made Various—a collection of short stories published by Lost Horse Press in 2006.

Paul's 'Last Words': “See you all in Ada come spring.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Paul Bower's short story collection, Like Men, Made Various (Lost Horse Press, 2006) is available for $18 from him (he’ll ship for free), or from www.losthorsepress.org. Anyone interested in purchasing this title may contact the author at Paul.Bowers@north-ok.edu. (You can find reviews at Amazon here.)

Interviewees, Come On Down!!!

2009-01-10T00:09:00.003-06:00

Dear Readers,

Now that the spring semester has gotten started [read: I finally got my act together] I'm ready to get the ball rolling on this Scissortail Fest--in the form of a series of interviews of sorts (with special thanks to all our spectacular soon-to-be guests for their enthusiastic participation). Below you'll find the questionnaire I sent out to all the fine folks for whom I have e-mail addresses who've decided to join us this year. First up is Paul Bowers, then Gordon Greene. After that...who knows?! (Well, after that, cheesecake, but then--who knows?!)

Questionnaire for Interviewees:

Define yourself in 15 words or less:

What ONE THING do you hope your readers 'get' from your work?

If you write fiction, are your characters based on people you know (even just a little bit) or do you make them up completely?

If you write non-fiction, what topic/topics are you most interested in exploring further in your work?

What's your educational background? You don't have to tell all, but please tell me what you majored in if you went to college. School names are not necessary if you prefer.

If you could only have one book to read for the rest of your life, which would you choose?

When did you first realize you wanted to be a writer?
What is your work schedule like when you're writing? Do you have another job?
What would you say is your interesting writing quirk?
Where do you get your information or ideas for your books?
When did you write your first book? Has it been published? (If so, please provide the info)
What do you like to do when you're not writing?
What does your family think of your writing?
What was one of the most surprising things you learned in creating your books?
How many books have you written? (Feel free to tell about things you're working on.) Which is your favorite?
What do you think makes a good story?
As a child, what did you want to do when you grew up?

Do you have a specific writing style?
How did you come up with the title?

Are there any new authors that have grasped your interest? (Besides me, of course.)

Do you recall how your interest in writing originated?
Can you share a little of your current work with us?
Is there anything you find particularly challenging in your writing?
Who is your favorite author and what is it that really strikes you about their work?
Do you have to travel much concerning your book(s)?

Do you have anything you'd like to add (statement to your readers, about the Festival, etc)?

...Finding Scissortail Participants in the Wild...

2008-12-30T00:00:00.008-06:00

Just in case you all HAVEN'T read everything by the spectacular writers who will be attending the Scissortail Festival in April, I've compiled a list of where to find some of the author's works. If you can't find what you're looking for here, check the links at the right of this post...or email me. Happy reading, ya'll!!

Rilla Askew's works can be found via most bookstores (if they don't have it in stock, they should be able to order books for you) or online by clicking the book cover images at www.RillaAskew.com.

~~~~~

Several of Carol Hamilton's books can be obtained from Amazon:

THE DAWN SEEKERS (children's novel)

THE MYSTERY OF BLACK MESA (children's novel)

LEGERDEMAIN (poetry chapbook)

I, PEOPLE OF THE LLANO (poetry chapbook)

SHOTS ON (poetry chapbook)

I'M NOT FROM NEPTUNE (children's novel) from Royal Fireworks Press at www.rfwp.com

GOLD: GREATEST HITS (poetry chapbook) from Pudding House at www.puddinghouse.com

VANISHING POINT (poetry chapbook) from Main Street Rag at www.MainStreetRag.com

SHOTS ON (poetry chapbook) from www.finishinglinepress.com

These and any others can also be obtained from the author via email at hamiltoncj@earthlink.net.

~~~~~~

The works of Ron Wallace can be found at his website, ronwallacepoetry.com, his publisher's site, TJMFPublishing.com, or on Amazon.com, or from sosubkstore.com.

~~~~~~

Paul Bower's short story collection, Like Men, Made Various (Lost Horse Press, 2006) is available for $18 from him (he’ll ship for free), or from www.losthorsepress.org. Anyone interested in purchasing this title may contact the author at Paul.Bowers@north-ok.edu.

~~~~~~

Steve Schroeder says his books, along with those of other vac poetry authors, can be found at these sites:

http://home.earthlink.net/~steven_schroeder

http://vacpoetry.org

~~~~~~

Nathan Brown has one book available on Amazon (any bookstore could get it for you, really) titled Not Exactly Job. You can find more of his works at the Full Circle Bookstore in OKC or the Crazy Ladies Bookshop in Norman.

~~~~~~

Some of Jennifer Kidney's works can be purchased from her via email at jennifer@okhumanitiescouncil.org (only Animal Magnetism, Women Who Sleep with the Dogs, and Life List are in print) or the last two may be purchased from Village Books Press (see: Dorothy Alexander) and Point Riders Press (http://www.hanksville.org/PointRiders/) may have a few copies of Endangered Species still available.

~~~~~~~

Everyone else is likely to be available from their respective websites and in some cases, from your local bookstore or sites like Amazon or the like. If you can't find something you're looking for, let me know and I'll do what I can to get it for you. Many, if not all, of the authors who attend Scissortail bring books to be sold, and the East Central University Bookstore makes many titles available as well.

A few additional sites you can use to find books:

http://abebooks.com
http://indiebound.com
http://powells.com

If anyone has any questions or anything to add, use that comment button!! Happy reading ya'll!!

Greetings, Blog-Land!

2008-12-09T22:11:00.015-06:00

Beginning this week--after finals are over, really--I'll be switching gears. That's right, the grammar thing is done with (for now, at least). As the spiffy new blog description so helpfully informs ya'll, the Scissortail Creative Writing Festival (SCWF) is coming up in a few months. So far we have around fifty (50!) or so authors committed to speaking engagements April 2-4, 2009.

For the next few months, I'll be posting information on authors and their work...along with any other interesting tidbits I can scrounge up.

Should anyone have a question about the Festival, the authors or their work...or anything else, let me know. [Contact info for the Festival is listed at right.]

~~~~SCWF Authors:

Elmer Kelton Rilla Askew LeAnne Howe

Carol Hamilton Jim Spurr Jim Chastain Nathan Brown

Carl Sennhenn Paul Bowers

Melissa Morphew Dorothy Alexander

Ken Hada Hugh Tribbey

Lauren Zuniga Steven Schroeder Patrick Ocampo

Sandra Soli Alan Berecka Jennifer Kidney

Jeanetta Calhoun Mish

Hardy Jones Ron Wallace Arn Henderson

Jane Taylor

Gordon Greene John G. Morris Alan Berecka

What's in a name?

2008-10-27T13:41:00.004-05:00

Back again to David Mulroy's War Against Grammar I go, this time to chapter two, "The First Liberal Art." Mulroy begins by giving a history of Greek and Roman educational practice, then later segues into his own opinion--on grammar, of course. He uses the respect most scholars (especially those who study language and literature) have for the Greek system--and attaches to that respect his insistence that they (the Greek) held the study and comprehension of grammar in high regard. (Having never met an ancient Greek scholar, and having only small insight into Greek education from their literatures and histories, we can only assume Mulroy culled this information from somewhere reputable.)

Mulroy's claim, mid-chapter, that "questioning the value of basic grammar is like asking whether farmers should know the names of their crops and animals," is, in my opinion, absurd. (Please don't force me to quote Shakespeare here...though I will if I must.) Would a cow stop producing milk if her owner did not call her a cow? Would corn be any less nourishing if it were known as something else, or as nothing more than food? If the answers to the preceding questions were affirmative, then it can be assumed that without knowledge of the eight principal parts of speech, nothing written or said would be intelligible.

While I concede that some degree of uniformity should be adopted in teaching our students to be fully literate, I do not think it needs to be as strict and formal as it must have been in the early days of formal Greek and Roman education.

In fact, I am sure that the teaching methods used by those early tutors would not translate to the modern school system well at all--this is exceedingly important to those of us who are headed for the public (and private) school systems because our most important goal is to educate the students in a way that will allow them to benefit from their education most fully.

If Pinker and Mulroy got into a fight...

2008-09-22T16:53:00.004-05:00

...how long do you think it would take for Pinker to get Mulroy to split an infinitive? Our reading of Pinker read like a conversation with an old drinking buddy (okay, Steve's photo didn't hurt), but this part of Mulroy's text (like some of the others, actually) sounds more like a pompous SNOOT or maven than anyone I'd hang out with. (Did I just end a sentence with a preposition? *gasp*)

Mulroy finds Pinker's argument inadequate in that he hasn't gone in depth in many of his statements. Sure, Pinker could have provided the facts to back up each and every point he made in the paper--but then he'd have sounded like Mulroy. By generalizing he shows his own belief that one need not know everything there is to know to 'sound smart.' Which is, undoubtedly, true. Just as one can be intelligent without an indepth knowledge of English grammar, so can one have a deep understanding of grammar and no knowledge of anything else.

Though I can appreciate the use of information from authors and noted thinkers who lived prior to the current century, I cannot buy into the beliefs of a man who bases his arguments on grammar solely (or almost so) on the prescriptions of eightheenth (or, Lord help us, nineteenth) century grammarians. Any modern linguist (heck, even old-school fellas like Labov) will tell you that language changes constantly, and therefore so does grammar.

And now, as hard as I've tried to break some rules in this post, I have yet to have good reason to smoothly split an infinitive. Oh my. I've done it.

See ya'll in the morning folks.

Interesting Etymologies, grammar folk...

2008-09-18T12:50:00.002-05:00

You thought the ones we talked about in class were weird...try these.

Helpful list for my myth mates...

2008-09-18T12:48:00.001-05:00

Check out this extensive list of gods and goddesses, both of the Greek and Roman persuasions.

Just for you, Stevie B! :)

2008-09-16T20:58:00.000-05:00

Cool Whip. Emphasis on the H. haha!

I mean it--Pinker for President!

2008-09-15T22:12:00.002-05:00

Of grammar, that is. (ha)

I couldn't help myself. (If the F-bomb offends, do NOT press play.)

If I had to vote for the President of Grammar, I think I'd pick...

2008-09-15T21:54:00.005-05:00

...Pinker. In his article titled 'Grammar Puss,' an excerpt from his book The Language Instinct, Pinker gives example after example of how stupid so many grammar rules are. It's kind of mind-blowing, really. I thought my professors were pulling my leg when they said that English grammar was based on rules decreed by some know-it-all Brit (no offence, British readers!). According to Pinker's article, English grammar isn't even based on the English language, but on Latin. Preposterous isn't it?

I do think Mulroy would agree with Pinker's foray into literal meaning--I can just see Mulroy and Pinker bellowing at each other over a pint or two about the 'literal meaning' of any word they could think of. Argument, as we've learned by reading the ATEG posts (for those of you who have) seems to be the communication tool of choice between 'English/grammar nerds.' As well it should be.

Wait, did I miss something?!

2008-09-09T13:05:00.006-05:00

Several of you (grammar students) have been talking about missing blogs, not knowing what was supposed to be blogged on, etc. I'm fairly certain I've hit them all, so here's the list. (Steve, correct me if I'm wrong.)

1.Autogrammography
2.Mulroy chapter 1
3.Writing Next
4. Tense Present
5.POINT of Tense Present
6.Beason/Ethos and Error
7. Interview Post Due 9/11
8. Grammar Puss/Pinker Post Due 9/16

EDIT: Thanks, Steve. I've got the article linked above for anyone who needs it. (No idea if it's the exact same link, since I still can't find the email.)

ETA: If you're looking for assignement updates, check out the class blog (it's in the blogroll too).

What does your word choice say about you?

2008-09-08T21:11:00.002-05:00

The folks over at the Gender Genie say their algorithm shows whether your writing is 'male' or 'female'....other folks seem to have luck with it, but I always get 'male.'

So, give it a try and see what you get. :)

Dear John,

2008-09-07T22:07:00.002-05:00

As promised, another humorous look at the importance of punctuation. Notice the effects in the following letters:

Dear John:

I want a man who knows what love is all about. You are generous, kind, thoughtful. People who are not like you admit to being useless and inferior. You have ruined me for other men. I yearn for you. I have no feelings whatsoever when we're apart. I can be forever happy --will you let me be yours?
Gloria

Dear John:

I want a man who knows what love is . All about you are generous, kind, thoughtful people, who are not like you. Admit to being useless and inferior. You have ruined me. For other men, I yearn. For you, I have no feelings whatsoever. When we're apart, I can be forever happy. Will you let me be? yours,
Gloria

(Note: above was sent to me via chain email. I do not know the original source)

Interview with a Professor

2008-09-07T21:39:00.004-05:00

In our readings of The War on Grammar, Mulroy gives several arguments as to why grammar instruction has grown lax in the United States. One of his more pronounced reasons for this lack of discipline is that “the whole concept of literal meaning has fallen into disfavor in academia.” It was on this concept that I began my interview with one of East Central’s professors of English and Language.

My interviewee, Spanish language Professor Wendy Leraas, unreservedly agrees with Mulroy on this point. As a teacher of language, she believes that the ability to discern the literal meaning of words or phrases is a necessity for anyone learning a foreign language. Furthermore, she feels that both language and writing skills are greatly improved when students know and are able to understand basic grammar concepts and parts of speech.

Just as you cannot teach students math when they have no knowledge of the properties of numbers, you cannot teach language when students have no knowledge of [at least] the basic conventions of grammar.

Professor Leraas asserts that grammar instruction and an understanding of literal meanings in English, the native tongue of the majority of her students, undoubtedly affects their abilities in her classroom. Her own academic past includes at least one full year of instruction exclusively focused on grammar and sentence diagramming, whereas many of her students are now unable to correctly identify even the simplest parts of speech, such as adjectives, adverbs, or nouns.

Her concern is that grammar instruction has begun to go the way of the multiplication tables and Roman numerals—axed from curriculum because it is perceived as ‘boring’ or unnecessary. Case in point, she notes that introductory textbooks designed to cushion the blow for beginning language students have traded the term ‘grammar’ lessons for lessons on ‘structure.’

Don't judge my ethos by my errors!

2008-09-06T12:38:00.008-05:00

Before I delve into Larry Beason's Ethos and Error: How Business People React to Errors, let me first define ethos as it pertains to writers. From the Greek word meaning 'accustomed place,' ethos here refers to the character (generally inferred by the reader) of an author of a piece of writing. Ethos can be affected by the way one writes or by biographical information included with a particular text. In the case of Beason's study, the ethos of the writer is perceived negatively as a result of the errors in the presented text.

First off, I am inclined to question Beason's method of evaluating the level of discomfort errors caused his subjects. Would the study subjects have been able to pick out the errors in the text? If not, would they have come away with a negative view of the writer, even if they didn’t know why?

Of course, this could be argued from the perspective of one who prescribes to the idea of Universal Grammar, though new studies would have to be carried out in order to determine whether extensive grammar knowledge plays a role in the perception of error. (Though I suspect it does since there seems to be a higher incidence of academics being bothered by errors than non-academics.)

Beason’s study found that, on average, the business people he studied found the presented errors irritating in the following order (from most to least irritating): fragments, misspellings, word-ending errors, fused sentences (aka run-ons), and then unnecessary quotation marks. On his rating scale (one being ‘not bothersome at all’ and 4 being ‘extremely bothersome) the average of all reactions to all the errors presented was 2.61, which falls about halfway between two (‘somewhat bothersome’) and three (‘definitely bothersome’).

These results make me wonder if they would respond the same way if the same errors were discovered in writings which represent their respective companies. Over half the subjects were only mildly disturbed by gross misspellings, even less so by less severe misspellings. I find it interesting that fourteen business people—some of whom were high level executives, did not find errors more irritating.

It seems that, even with few subjects, Beason has generated findings that would correlate to Halstead’s theory on the affects of error.Beason seems to have performed this study with only minor interest in the reactions of business people to errors. His main goal must have been to help students “[understand that] the myriad ways in which a writer’s ethos can be unnecessarily endangered by errors” and encourage them “to avoid mistakes that careful proofreading would prevent” (59)

The importance of sentence structure... (WARNING: May be offensive.)

2008-09-05T14:29:00.002-05:00

Sometimes you have to learn by example. Here ya go:

The boss had to fire somebody and he narrowed it down to one of
two people - Debra or Jack.

It was an impossible decision because they were both superb workers. Rather than flip a coin, he decided he would fire the first one who used the water cooler the next morning.

Debra came in the next morning with a horrible hangover after partying all night. She went straight to the cooler to take an aspirin.

The boss approached her and said: 'Debra, I've never done this before but I have to lay you or Jack off. '

'Could you jack off?' she says. 'I feel like shit'

Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee...

2008-09-03T22:06:00.003-05:00

Hey Wallace! What's your point?

2008-09-03T13:30:00.004-05:00

The reason for David Foster Wallace's article "Tense Present" was to review Bryan A. Garner's A Dictionary of Modern American Usage. Though he take the long way around, Wallace uses research and theory to back up his view of Garner's dictionary as the most egalitarian in dealing with today's issues in English Language usage.

By emphasizing the problems with the English language in its spoken and written forms, Wallace allows his reader to make the connections themselves. After reading his article, albeit twice, I intend to find a copy of Garner's dictionary and see for myself how accurate Wallace's views on the text are.

Happy Birthday, Ganesh!

2008-09-02T23:37:00.005-05:00

Today (well, it IS Wednesday already in India) is the celebration of Ganesh's birthday. Ganesh is the elephant-headed Hindu god depicted in the photos in this post and the son of Shiva and Parvati. Hindus celebrate with a festival called Gane sh Chaturthi. This 10 day festival is a grand celebration requiring new clothing for worshippers and god-statues alike, as well as food, music and dance.

There--you learned a little something about another culture today.

How's YOUR grammar?

2008-09-02T14:29:00.004-05:00

I have a little quiz for anyone who would like to partake. The site explains each question after you've chosen an answer--great for anyone who might be struggling with some of the grammar concepts. Give it a shot.

Oh, and I thought this was fun too:

Make Time for Grammar

SNAFU: Tense Present

2008-09-01T23:39:00.009-05:00

Wallace's article "Tense Present" is undeniably dense--like many of my classmates I read the article with dictionary in hand. It was interesting, however, to read an academic article in which the author felt at ease enough to share family stories and state his own opinion in colloquial terms.
His analysis of Descriptivism's basic rules is dead on (45)--like Wallace, I agree they make some valid points, but lack anticipation of their opposition's views, let alone those in the middle somewhere. His rebuttal, though humorous, raises pertinent questions--some of which he answers within the text.

I can almost prescribe to the idea Universal Grammar--given that, for the most part, that its ideas coincide with my own personal experiences--especially with Wallace's example of how a sentence can be meaningful though not grammatically correct. We learn as children how to communicate orally [with written language often coming much later] by example--which is how we write unless we're taught otherwise. This is where the differences between SWE and spoken dialects of English create grammatical issues that we teachers must deal with in the classroom (48).

"Anybody...who wants to succeed in American culture has got to be able to use SWE. This Is How It Is" (54). That just about covers it for me. In literature we may have more leeway when it comes to grammar and usage--but in more formal situations is becomes more important to have a standardized view of both.

Grammar: A component of literacy?

2008-09-01T12:31:00.004-05:00

Today's reading is: WritingNext, a report to the Carnegie Corporation of New York, authored by Steve Graham and Delores Perin. In the summary of their research on writing, the authors state that writing, like reading comprehension, is an indicator of scholastic success--as well as a necessity for life. They define literacy as a combination of reading and writing skills (11).

As you may infer from my previous posts on grammar and writing, I agree with their findings. Like Graham and Perin, I believe that poor writing and comprehension skills play a major role in the literacy crisis in our nation. The inablity of many high school and college students to read and analyze (as well as summarize, as we discussed with the Mulroy reading) text is appalling.

If our students (like ourselves) cannot utilize basic grammar rules in order to ascertain the precise meanings of even the shortest of texts, how are we to expect them to, say, understand poetry or comprehend longer works of prose?

Carnegie Corporation
Alliance for Excellent Education

Glassfire's Summer 2008 issue is up!

2008-08-29T08:30:00.002-05:00

Here's the homepage.

My story is under non-fiction. Feel free to comment here. (Even if you don't like it...c'mon, I'm a big girl!)

Be sure to check out the other sections too--there are some very good pieces this issue.

Weapons of Grammatical Instruction

2008-08-27T15:53:00.003-05:00

David Mulroy's "The War Against Grammar" is quite interesting, especially for a textbook. The first chapter, titled "America the Grammarless," deals with the American school system's lack of grammar instruction. It's frustrating that the problem seemed to have began years ago when teachers, for whatever reason, decided to stop teaching grammar, thus creating a domino effect with the end result being that few students are taught grammar at all, and even fewer grasp grammar concepts well enough to teach them.

According to Mulroy, attempts to teach grammar at the college level is basically fruitless. I suppose grammar is just one of those 'tricks' you can't teach 'old dogs.' From my studies of child psychology and development as well as language aquisition, I'd say this makes good sense. Studies have shown younger children to be more adept at learning a second language than older children and especially adults. Children also retain much more language instruction than an adolescent or adult would. Going on that information, I am inclined to support early and continuious grammar instruction, before formal writing and literature instruction begins. The most important factor for optimal retention, in my opinion, is the application of grammar rules and terminology not just in the early years of a child's education, but throughout their entire academic careers.

Toward the end of the chapter, Mulroy laments the loss of understanding of literal meanings due to lacking grammar instruction. Again, I'm going to agree with Mulroy--inability to accurately comprehend and paraphrase text is a form of illiteracy, especially at the college level. This is probably most detrimental to the English major--because nearly every aspect of the coursework requires analysis and summary of many forms of text. It only gets worse for those of us who are working toward our teaching certificates.

ATTN: Pre-service teachers

2008-08-27T08:56:00.003-05:00

If you qualify, the state could pay up to $17,500 on your Stafford (sub and unsub) student loans after you've been teaching for 5 years. Check it out:
http://www.ogslp.org/students/teacher-loan-forgiveness.shtml

Beware of the SPELL CHECKER

2008-08-27T08:47:00.003-05:00

Someone (I think it was Tommy) mentioned the evils of the spell checker...so I thought I'd dredge up this little beauty. You probably have to be an English major (or professor!) to think its funny, but here it is anyway:

Spell Check Poem
Also know as…
The Pullet Surprise Can Did Ate

(Read it out loud!)

Eye halve a spelling chequer
It came with my pea sea,
It plainly marques four my revue
Miss steaks eye kin knot sea.

Eye strike a key and type a word
And weight for it two say,
Weather eye and wring oar write
It shows me strait a weigh.

As soon as a mist ache is maid
It nose bee fore two long,
And eye can put the error rite
Its rare lea ever wrong.

To rite with care is quite a feet
Of witch won should bee proud,
And wee mussed dew the best wee can,
Sew flaw's are knot aloud.

Eye have run this poem threw it
Your sure reel glad two no,
Its letter perfect awl the weigh
My chequer tolled me sew.

-Sauce unknown

http://www.randyshomestead.com/jokebook/spell_check_poem.htm

Sleepless nights...

2008-08-26T23:27:00.010-05:00

...and early mornings do not make me a happy girl. I know you're all DYING to hear about all the FUN stuff going on this semester--but you'll just have to wait until tomorrow. Sorry to disappoint.

Meanwhile, anyone looking for something to do to pass some time or a good place to get quality feedback on your writing (or anyone who, for whatever reason, wants to read some of mine) check this site out:

urbis.com/goofygoober168

And a tasty tidbit for the grammar kiddies:

The Importance of Punctuation

And a wee snackle for anyone still hungry:

Innovative Punctuation

And just in case anyone missed it, National Punctuation Day is September 24, which falls on a Wednesday this year.

Grammar, O Grammar...

2008-08-23T12:58:00.003-05:00

For many of us English majors, grammar is the bane of our existence. True, it can be a pain in the butt having to go over and over a piece of writing correcting grammatical errors--but it is worth it in the end, no matter how much hair you pull out in the process. As a writer, I've run into grammatical 'issues' where something I was taught in grade school didn't 'sound right' to an editor---ah, if only they'd been taught grammar as well!

Even with the minimal grammar lessons I had in elementary and junior high school, I feel severely ill-equipped to study grammar at a college level. I don't think it would be a problem for me to teach basic grammar--anything beyond that though, could end in disaster. I chalk this up to the lack of grammar being taught during the time I was in primary and secondary school, but also in the lack of USAGE of grammar terminology once the curriculum turned more toward literature and writing.

Across the US, grammar is slowly making a comeback...but that won't help those of us who are now studying in universities--to become teachers, no less--with little or no knowledge of basic grammar principles, let alone a grasp of how to apply or *gasp* teach them. (If you find yourself in a sticky spot, especially if you've got children in school who are learning grammar, try Scholastic's Parent Primer.)

Sadly, technology is little help. Students, even adults, are restoring to a peculiar short-hand language used in chat rooms, instant messenger programs, and in text messaging. It's depressing--how on earth are we to communicate if everyone is making up acronyms, dropping vowels from words to save time, and forgoing the use of punctuation altogether? Take this for example:

(Hamlet, Act Three, Scene One)

In 'txt speak': "2 b, r nt 2 b dat iz d Q wthr ts noblr n d mnd 2 sufr d slngs & arowz of outrAjs fortn r 2 tAk armz agnst a C f trblz, & by oposn nd em?"

As it was written: "To be, or not to be: that is the question: / Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer / The slings and arrows of outrageous fortune, / Or to take arms against a sea of troubles / And by opposing end them?"

Now, honestly, who can understand the 'txt speak' version?! (Interestingly, the short-hand version was pulled from an article about this sort of answer being ACCEPTED on exams. Pshaw.)

Attention Blog Readers, Grammar Students, Dr. B

2008-08-19T21:48:00.003-05:00

Just so everyone knows...this semester I'll be blogging about Grammar. Yes, that's right, grammar. Dr. B requires it...and I'm far too lazy to create a new blog for it. Besides, a few extra grammar lessons/review won't hurt anyone at all, writer people. Right? Certainly not.

For anyone in the class having issues creating a blog, please email me via commenting on this blog (make sure you put your email in the form so I can get back to you) or email me at: amanda.b.dill @ gmail . com (omit spaces).

Peace, people.

My first blog contest--for a VERY good cause!

2008-08-16T14:12:00.005-05:00

Very few people I've talked to have heard of the Brain Candy Project. We all know what cancer is though--and even if you've never experienced the struggle of living with an incurable disease or seen the effects first-hand, the fact that it IS difficult not often disputed.

I'm not going to bore you with facts and figures, I won't even post photos of kids who've been torn down by chemo and excessive medication. I won't implore you to read the websites, blogs and forums dedicated to my cause. I'll tell you where they are--if you're reading this you're old enough to make the decision whether to ignore this or help.

I am hopeful that many will donate or participate in making this project a major success--so much so that I have a proposition for all who read this. See, I've pledged to raise $100 for this cause through Facebook Causes. Many people don't have Facebook or distrust the process of sending money over the internet for whatever reason. So here's the deal--if you're on Facebook let me know. I'll add and recruit you, so all you have to do is accept and then donate. If not, donate through THE BRAIN CANDY PROJECT and let me know you have and how much. Anyone who sends new readers to my blog for the purpose of this contest, please make sure your 'recruits' mention you in their message. I'll keep track of who has donated/recruited the most.

How do you win? Ha, funny you should ask. It'll work the same here as it does on Facebook--the more people you tell about BCP/this post, the more likely people will donate under you. She/he who has the most recruits has the best odds of raising the most money--and winning a fantastic tin of the best cookies EVER! (Mrs. Fields--they really are the best ever!)

Start linking, emailing, IMing--heck, send smoke signals if that's what you have to do. There are families in urgent need of help NOW!

Prizes start going out when donations to THE BRAIN CANDY PROJECT reach $250.

Donate directly to the BCP.

A little help, here, please?

2008-08-14T14:54:00.004-05:00

I've got two words for ya: query letter.

Writing it, yeah...being confident about it...ah, not so much.

So...if you're willing to help me out [ie, read it and tell me what you think, no major editing unless it's really, really bad] I'll do something for you. Reciprocal editing is great. If you really, really impress me, I might even send actual cookies.

Negotiations begin...NOW.

BTW, it's for a Romance meets racing kinda thing...so...yup.

UPDATE: Age banding

2008-08-14T13:38:00.005-05:00

Here, folks, is the email I recieved today from the fine folks who, like me, do not want children's books age-banded. Please refer to last month's post on the topic or visit NO TO AGE BANDING dot ORG

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Dear Amanda Dill,

We are pleased to say that we continue to get encouraging news from many of the 750 authors and illustrators who have signed up on our site, and very little discouraging news from others. We still, of course, have serious concerns, particularly about new and inexperienced authors who are not yet apprised of the issues surrounding the age banding of books.

Meanwhile, the Annual Conference of the Children's Writers and Illustrators Group (CWIG) of the Society of Authors will be held over the weekend of 29-31st August at Robinson College, Cambridge. During this weekend there will be a full discussion of the issues surrounding this vexed matter.

In the following week, we shall be sending you all a full account of this meeting.

We would like to thank you once again for your enormously helpful support and ask you to keep discussing the issues with anyone who might take an interest. Please also continue to encourage people to sign up on the site if they are in sympathy.

Good wishes to all.

I was gonna show off my Mexican dinner...

2008-08-13T01:31:00.002-05:00

...but it smelled so good it barely made it to the plate. Maybe next time you'll see some photos. :)

I've finally cracked the 'restaurant rice' code...it's so good, it's probably a sin. Don't even get me started on the sopapillas. If you don't know what a sopapilla is, please, PLEASE ask me for the recipe, and them promise to make them. Definitely worth it.

Next week: Native American Fry bread may or may not live long enough to become Indian tacos.

Way too young to feel this damn old...

2008-08-12T13:21:00.003-05:00

No way. My little baby cannot possibly old enough to start school. He can't be five already, can he?

*sigh*

He is. He starts tomorrow. Kindergarten. Funny how this 'grade' that is the 'transition' from being a care free little kid to being a 'big kid' in school for real is called a 'children's garden.'

Grow little tree. Grow.

Can't contain it anymore!!

2008-07-31T23:34:00.004-05:00

I'm kinda excited.

Ok, I'm really excited. :)

If you've never read Glassfire Magazine, you should do it now!!

I won't even request that you wait until the Summer 2008 issue comes out---since that's the issue I'll have a story published in. It's good. Really good. You should go check it out.

Occupational Hazards...

2008-07-28T16:46:00.006-05:00

It's not unsual to be chased by a dinosaur before breakfast--at least not at my house. I don't even bat an eye at the sight of a race car hurtling through my living room as two dinosaurs roar from behind the kitchen counter. It wouldn't surprise me if Spongebob showed up for lunch driving SpeedRacer's car--and asked for his own Krabby Patty.

It keeps me on my toes--quite literally. I have to watch where I put them these days--otherwise I could end up bruised or worse. Small toys hidden under the edge of a rug or discarded blankie are one of the worst occupational hazards for parents. You can't deny that parenthood is a full time job...and then some. No vacations, no sick days, no overtime. It's rough, yeah...but any mommy or daddy will tell ya--it's all worth it--even the bruises and sleepless (ie, sexless) nights--for one ice cream flavored sticky kiss on a summer afternoon...one early morning snuggle session...not to mention that huge grin (perhaps missing a tooth or two) when a five year old puts their supplies in their first backpack all by themselves...

*sigh*

Second on the list of worst occupational hazards: tears.

Text message...From a Triangle??!

2008-07-15T10:58:00.003-05:00

I'll admit it, I text...often. Especially on days I have class--it's easier to text than to find a quiet enough place to hold a conversation. Besides, I think it's kind of rude to walk about blabbing on the phone all the time.

So, imagine my surprise when my phone emitted that tell-tale bleep telling me a new text had arrived to find A MESSAGE FROM A TRIANGLE! No way to respond, no message other than " @ "--and of course, the phone company has no idea what it is/was, and I haven't found any mention of anything like this on any search engine. Strange eh?

Age banding? No way, Jose...

2008-07-03T20:32:00.003-05:00

I'm with JK Rowling all the way on this one...age banding for children's and young adults books is not a good idea. As a writer, it concerns me. But as a teacher, it threatens my options and my teaching methods.

Forget for a minute the concerns of 'age appropriate' reading materials. Think about this from another prospective. What about the students who are not reading 'on level'? How will they feel when the books they can handle are banded for children 2 or more years younger than they are? Same deal for students whose first language isn't English--it takes seven years for their language comprehension to be equal in English and their native tongue. Are they to be sentenced to ridicule because they are reading books on a lower level than their classmates?

Since when are recommendations and reviews online and in print not enough for teachers and librarians to distribute books to their students? IT'S OUR JOB. Many of us pride ourselves on matching our kids with books that not only interest them, but that they can comprehend as well.

Join JK Rowling, myself, and many other authors, librarians, and teachers in saying NO to age banding.

http://www.notoagebanding.org/

Hey, I actually won something...

2008-07-02T18:01:00.003-05:00

It pays to read--today I have proof. (Well, it also pays to be nosy and poke around looking at other writers' blogs...but hey...it's not like I was snooping through their purses!) I won a copy of Darlene Ryan's YA novel titled Rules for Life from HelenKay Dimon's blog.

It and several other books I've been wanting to read (including another by Darlene Ryan and a couple by HelenKay Dimon) are due to arrive any day now.

Here's to good books--both reading and writing them.

IHSC Newsletter...

2008-07-01T14:02:00.002-05:00

http://docs.google.com/View?docID=dc687pn6_495m3579kg9&revision=_latest

Featuring...ME. :)

It's pretty much verbatim my first post to this blog...but it's kind of cool to see my name in a newsletter I didn't write. :) (OK, I wrote my 'story'...and the poem...but the rest--wasn't me.)

It's no surprise to me...

2008-06-30T23:10:00.006-05:00

...that my husband was born in the year of the Monkey. Aside from his physical appearance (the man can shave at 7 am and have a 5 o'clock shadow by 9), he is unusually...well, monkey-like. Yes, he's quite flexible (get your mind out of the gutter, that's NOT what I meant!) but that's not all. The man can climb on top of a nearly 10 foot tall semi-truck trailer...in mere seconds. It's unreal. I've seen him go up a particularly difficult indoor rock-climbing wall as well--much faster and with less effort than anyone else there that day--and that's something, considering he NEVER works out, goes to the gym...heck, he doesn't even eat his veggies half the time.

See, all of this started this afternoon when I received an email offering a 'preview' of my Chinese horoscope. While I didn't care to pay for such a thing...it did make me curious. I, apparently, was born in the year of the Ox (1985) and incidentally, next year (well, next Chinese year, starting January 28...) is also the year of the Ox. Maybe that means it will be a good year.

That would be nice.

Pay attention long enough to watch this video, please.

2008-06-30T22:33:00.002-05:00

New mindset...new projects...

2008-06-30T19:44:00.004-05:00

It's that time of year again--time to shake out my dusty ole brain, shine it up, and get things moving along again. It also means it's time for old projects to be polished up and displayed and new ones to be born into existence. My foray into horror this week via The Mammoth Book of Best New Horror 17 has brought interesting and new twists to both my thought processes and my writings...I suppose I'll find out soon whether this will be a positive or negative influence.

This old laptop has a lot of words floating around inside of it...most of which belong to poems and short stories...but these days there are also two novels--one just beginning and one about half-grown--and one book about Intracranial Hypertension in the planning stages. Some might think I've got too many things 'in the air'...but I like it that way. Keeps me from getting bored...and keeps my work from stagnating.

I have a sudden craving for something containing cream cheese and copious amounts of butter...sounds like time for my mama's version of the Neiman Marcus cake. :)

NEEDLE + SPINE = CRAPPY WEEKEND

2008-06-30T15:39:00.001-05:00

There is nothing fun about a spinal tap. Nothing whatsoever. I almost wanted to laugh when the doctor with the huge needle inserted in my spinal cord insisted that I 'relax'...heh. Sure I will. (Just about as much as he could if the two of us switched places...)

I guess it's worth it though, even if it's only good for a couple of headache free (well, mostly) days. I just hope it's not like last time (when the pressure surged back, full force, seemingly all at once).

Anyway, for any med students or fellow IHer's, my pressure was down from 51 to 43. For non-med students/IHer's...that's still more than twice what a 'normal' pressure should be. Although the papilledema (swelling of the optic nerve) is pretty much gone now, the headache is still with me.

Toward a life UNcomplicated...

2008-06-30T15:38:00.003-05:00

Relationships take work. Nobody is perfect. When you come from a long line of broken marriages, shattered dreams, and relationships or friendships that never seem to last, it becomes harder and harder to believe that forever can be real or that you can ever really trust anyone, least of all yourself. Luckily for me, I have found at least one person who is in it for the long haul…and I'm sticking with him—forsaking all others, forgetting all past entanglements (may they rest in peace…or pieces, depending on who it was…heh.). The hardest thing for me, for most of us, really, is to forgive. While I may not be able to forgive all, or to forget…well, ever, I am just not capable of holding grudges anymore. So you can chalk it up as a victory for Intracranial Hypertension (and the fact that it's made me more forgetful than I ever was before…) or as a personal one…I don't care. Just let go…and be gone. I don't need the stress and drama that comes from having high maintenance friendships—if you can't hang, let go. I'm not going to carry the baggage anymore. (Let's face it, my own is heavy enough.)

It really IS all in my head...

2008-06-30T15:34:00.004-05:00

It's official. I'm a 'headcase.' If it seems like I talk about myself and Intracranial Hypertension a lot...I am. Not because I want or need attention though--this disease DOES.

I know I don't go into a lot of detail, but if you want to know more, visit www.ihrfoundation.org.

I went to what I thought was a routine eye exam (with my 4 year old son in tow, he wears glasses too) on Tuesday [March 4 2008]. The optometrist FREAKED OUT and started talking about brain tumors and MRIs and spinal taps in the middle of my exam. I did have an MRI that day, and a day and a half later, was told that it was 'clear.' I was then scheduled for a spinal tap that Friday morning. At that point, I had no idea what was going on with my own body, but according to local doctors, it's this pseudotumor cerebri thing... I had been going to my PCP for headaches for a few years—and was being given migraine meds (which did NOTHING) and thought I might be having some hormonal issues...but then the eye exam revealed papilledema, and everything sort of fell into place. According to Dr. W, the opthomologist, the nausea, vomiting, diarrhea, headaches, blurred vision, etc, were all symptoms of either a tumor (which we know now I don't have) or IH...
After a harrowing couple of days wondering what we would find out, Friday, and my first lumbar puncture, finally arrived. I don't think I've ever been as happy to see a needle. The doc said my opening pressure was 51, which, as he said was more than twice what was considered normal for my 'size.' (He said normal was 18.) They drained two huge tubes of fluid (no idea how much exactly) and said that would help with the headaches for a while. They put me on Diamox (1000mg/day) too...and they said I need to lose 10-20 pounds. I asked if he knew of any studies showing significant improvement with weight loss, and he said he'd ask his colleague--apparently he didn't have extensive experience w/PTC but this other guy in the clinic does, so--and he'd get back to me on that. They did 'officially' diagnose me with PTC...well, the doc said 'beigin (sp?) intracranial hypertension'...but I dislike that name.

I have been blessed with a team of doctors who, while they may not be the foremost experts on IH, are doing their very best to fight for me and doing everything they can to meet my needs and make me feel better. They are always there for me when I have a question, which is often. As it is a learning health facility, there are interns everywhere. I feel like I should allow any and all of the interns and students who want to either see the papilledema or ask me questions to do so—if for no other reason than that they will have *something* to call to mind should another IH victim come to them for help later on. Who knows? They can't learn if they don't see/hear it.

As time goes on, and I begin to get a little more used to life with IH and Diamox, I find out new things about myself, like my newfound sensitivity to temperature changes, strong odors, bright or flashing lights, and other sundry and irritating things. Losing weight seems like a bit less of a battle since I can no longer drink soda (to which I was formerly addicted in a bad way), cannot really eat much at once, and most things I shouldn't eat (like sugary syrups) taste like they're filled with minuscule bits of metal or some other foul and chemical flavor.

Just like anyone else, with IH or without, I have good days and bad days…I just measure them a bit differently. On good days, I don't have pressure spikes that cause my personality to change in an instant, I don't feel like my body has been taken over by an alien being, and I don't feel useless. I can speak in complete sentences and even remember where I am going or what I am doing for more than three minutes at a time. On bad days, I lash out at loved ones or even strangers for no real reason, eat everything in sight or nothing at all, cry for no reason and smile in the next breath, even blank out altogether, impugning my own intelligence. On any given day though, I love both my sons unconditionally, and do my very best to do all the things I did before IH chose me. I am still me on the inside, even when it doesn't show much on the outside. I will still fight tooth and nail for any cause that stirs me, including my right to adamantly refuse to accept that my weight is the reason for my IH diagnosis. A year ago, maybe, but not now.

Most of you have heard by now: I'm a writer. I write research papers, articles, novels (well, I've ghostwritten chapters...but I'm working on my own), recipes, and poetry.

Here is a bit of the latter, written about IH, in a way...but also sort of for my family and friends who have been learning to deal with IH along with me.

Brave
© Amanda Dill April 2008

I am brave.
I am not afraid
Of the rain,
No matter what it brings.

I am brave.
I am not afraid
Of asking for help
No matter what you think of me.

I am brave.
I am not afraid
Of fighting
For my right
To live without pain,
To love without second thoughts,
To laugh without worry.

I want to be who I was
Not who I have become.
I want my freedom,
The freedom you take for granted
Almost every day.

I want to be who I was,
Not who I have become.
I want to be able to take care of myself
Without feeling like
I'm taking you for granted
Almost every day.

I am afraid.
But,
I am brave.

Amanda Dill: The Worst Blogger Ever

Letter from a Professor

Chronic Pain Barbie

::Down and Dirty Southern Cookin':: (aka Swine Flu Supper)

::You Must Be THIS MUCH Injun to Ride::

The crappiest thing about poetry...

::Eat This Book::

A DELICIOUS Meal...& A Poem

WARNING--grammar and humor in one post--contents may explode.

Psst: You Like This Book!

::Uno Mas::

::A Birthday Wish::

Worst. Blogger. Ever.

~*Scissortail Schedule 2009*~

Surface Tension

...This Just In...

I think Alice had it right on this one in her response to the hookah-smoking caterpillar...

Good writing is... “a grabber opening, a memorable ending and about 1500 well-chosen words in between.”

...Taller Than the Average Bear...

Interviewees, Come On Down!!!

...Finding Scissortail Participants in the Wild...

Greetings, Blog-Land!

What's in a name?

If Pinker and Mulroy got into a fight...

Interesting Etymologies, grammar folk...

Helpful list for my myth mates...

Just for you, Stevie B! :)

I mean it--Pinker for President!

If I had to vote for the President of Grammar, I think I'd pick...

Wait, did I miss something?!

What does your word choice say about you?

Dear John,

Interview with a Professor

Don't judge my ethos by my errors!

The importance of sentence structure... (WARNING: May be offensive.)

Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee...

Hey Wallace! What's your point?

Happy Birthday, Ganesh!

How's YOUR grammar?

SNAFU: Tense Present

Grammar: A component of literacy?

Glassfire's Summer 2008 issue is up!

Weapons of Grammatical Instruction

ATTN: Pre-service teachers

Beware of the SPELL CHECKER

Spell Check PoemAlso know as… The Pullet Surprise Can Did Ate

(Read it out loud!)

Sleepless nights...

Grammar, O Grammar...

Attention Blog Readers, Grammar Students, Dr. B

My first blog contest--for a VERY good cause!

A little help, here, please?

UPDATE: Age banding

I was gonna show off my Mexican dinner...

Way too young to feel this damn old...

Can't contain it anymore!!

Occupational Hazards...

Text message...From a Triangle??!

Age banding? No way, Jose...

Hey, I actually won something...

IHSC Newsletter...

It's no surprise to me...

Pay attention long enough to watch this video, please.

New mindset...new projects...

NEEDLE + SPINE = CRAPPY WEEKEND

Toward a life UNcomplicated...

It really IS all in my head...

~Scissortail Schedule 2009~

Spell Check Poem
Also know as…
The Pullet Surprise Can Did Ate